Loving in light of . . . not in spite of

John 13:34-35 English Standard Version (ESV)

³⁴ A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another. ³⁵ By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.”

In this passage, the Lord commands us to love one another and says that this will show others that we are his disciples.  Loving one another well will demonstrate our love for the Lord and bring glory to him.

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about what it means to really love people and how to do this well.  The Lord commands this of me and it is something that I truly desire to do well.  Loving well is perhaps the key to successful ministry.  While this is an area that I have just begun to examine through scripture and prayer, I would like to share some of what the Lord has revealed to me thus far.

To truly love people we must truly know them.  We must know their story.  This means that we will know their gifts and their successes as well as their mistakes and wrongs.  It is how we approach our response to this that reveals the true nature of our love for them.

It is easy to love others in light of their gifts and successes.  These things reveal the best in the person and in turn naturally incite affection for them, which can effortlessly evolve into a love that is deemed acceptable to demonstrate.

On the flip side, it is encouraged and often an aspiration to love others in spite of their mistakes and wrongs.  After all, isn’t this a complete love . . . to love others in spite of their full story?  I would say to you that it is not.  I would challenge you to consider that the love that the Lord commands of us requires more of us.  I would challenge you to consider that people are worth the effort to realize that their mistakes and wrongs are part of what make them who we are . . . part of what enables them to play their role in the body of Christ to bring glory to the Him.

What if the true person is what motivates our love for them instead of being the thing that we “overlook” in order to deem them worthy of the love we are giving to them?  What if we aspire to love others in light of, instead of in spite of, their COMPLETE story . . . mistakes and wrongs included?  This sounds like a more complete love to me.  This sounds like the love of Christ.  This love sounds like the love that I want to aspire to have for others.